I get asked this question 9000 times per day. Maybe that’s a little bit of a hyperbole, but it feels like that. Bubbles is having a CRAZY hard time figuring out possessions. Is this hers? Should she touch it? Will she have to share it? When will she have to share it? If she does share it, when will she get it back?
Imagine NEVER having anything of your own. Now you’ve been thrust into a world of ridiculous excess. What is yours? How much can you get from your new parents? Where is the line drawn? Bubbles isn’t sure. So, we have all these questions to try to figure it out. She really likes Gigantobaby’s Dora plate. So, she asks “Dis (this) a (is) for me?”. I try to explain that she can eat off of it this time, then Gigantobaby will eat off of it next time, because he could care less abut it. I tell her it is for everybody. She immediately goes into hysterics. “DIS A FOR ME!!!!”. So, because she’s laying on the ground screaming, she has to sit in her room (door open) until she can calm down. Now I’ve punished her for wanting a plate of her own. Do I buy her one? Isn’t that teaching her that she gets what she wants all the time. Isn’t that contributing to the excess? But, she wants her own plate. It’s just a plate. At the orphanage she had one bowl that she always wanted, she wasn’t big enough or fast enough to get it first. It drove her nuts!!!! It made me sad that because she was one of the littlest kids there she couldn’t ever kept that coveted bowl. So, I bought her a big divided “Hello Kitty” plate from the dollar bin at Target. You should have seen her eyes light up over this plate. I bought different characters for each of the kids (including one for GhanaGal and GhanaGuy). She loved pointing at all of them and telling each kid “DIS IS FOR YOU!!!”. Then she would look at her own coveted plate and say “BUT…DIS A FOR ME!!!”.
So, after much discussion about this, we’re trying to help Bubbles learn when enough is enough. She has all the clothes, shoes and hair accessories she needs. She chose her baby, her most prized possession, the one toy she never has to share. Now she has a special plate. When she asked for her own cell phone, the answer was a firm “No, that is for mama”.
who is going to use her iphone, because “dis a for me”.