When Is It Enough?

There isn’t much of an update on Hope, with the holidays the Embassy is slow, so there aren’t many answers as to why her visa was denied.  We think it’s a temporary thing, but it might not be.  We have to brace ourselves for that too.

We do know that Hope’s birth mom would prefer not to be a parent anymore.  I’m sure it’s hard to parent a daughter who has special needs when you’re young and live in a country where special needs aren’t exactly accepted.  I’m also sure it’s hard for the Embassy to approve a temporary visa for a child who might not have anyone to go back to.  I understand their predicament, but that doesn’t make this any easier to bear when it comes to this one child.  This one child that we’ve all fallen in love with.  This one child who is still in a rough situation.  At Christmas time.  
It’s hard to imagine that.  It’s also hard to even consider what might need to happen next.  In order to get the medical care she needs, and deserves…
She may need to be adopted.  
Yes.  I said it.  
So, we told the children this tonight.  We were trying to prepare them for the idea that it might not be our home that Hope comes to.  Surprisingly, the thing they were all most upset about is that she won’t be here for Christmas.  They want, for her, what they have.  The GhanaDuo understands what it means to be here for Christmas.  Not just because of the stuff, but because of the security and the love of a family.  They were all praying for some sort of miracle that would bring Hope here.  I love that about my kids.  
When we told them that she might not come here, they were appalled.  If there is a child that needs to be adopted, well, they’re sure we should adopt them.  I asked Middle-Middle and Giggles, who were with me at the time, when they thought it would be enough.  When would it be enough adoptions?  When would it be enough children?  Didn’t they ever feel slighted?  They live in a house with SEVEN other children while other homes have two, maybe three.  Don’t they understand what they’re missing?  
Apparently, they have no clue.  As we talked about it, Bubbly joined the conversation, along with ShyGuy and ResponsiBoy.  They lobbied hard, telling me all the things they LOVE about being in a big family, all the things their friends will never know.  Remember that time we climbed the climbing wall at that carnival and the were giving away FREE TACOS to everyone who made it to the top?  MOM!  We got more tacos than anyone else!  Remember when we got on the subway in Boston and everyone thought we were a school?  HA!  We all laughed when they wouldn’t believe we were just a family!  There’s always someone to play with.  I’m never lonely.  ResponsiBoy taught me to read!  Bubbly taught me that you can climb the decorative pole in the foyer!  Great.  
The list goes on and on.  How do you argue with that logic?  For just a moment, I get all inspired and I think, we could totally do this again!  Then, I think about all the adult logic that goes into a decision like this?  How the heck am I going to pay for college?  How will we ever take a real vacation again?  What lunatic will EVER agree to babysit for us again?  FPD and I will DIE of old age and we’ll still be parenting!  AHHH!
Then, I think about this…
How do you argue with that logic?  
who may not be able to argue anymore at all.  So, she renewed her passport.  

2 thoughts on “When Is It Enough?”

  1. The H Fam will babysit for you anytime, and that holds true whether there be 7, 8 or 15 kids. When is it enough? My personal opinion (perhaps not shared by my spouse) is that our family is “done” when there is no more need for us to make room for One More. And since that day will never come, I guess I’m never going to say “It’s Enough.” Logic can bite me on the booty! Right now, logic is just plain on my nerves, because it is my personal roadblock to one BIG thing that Faith tells me is right, and good to do.Still praying for Hope. Her sweet little smile has totally caught my heart. May she be safe and loved, and may the visa come through soon!


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