Broken heart, Tess

Choose HOPE.

For those of you who don’t follow Dolly and Poppy’s updates on Facebook, it was a big day around here yesterday.  Dolly had her heart cath, the one that would give us much needed information about her future operability.  Leading up to this procedure, she and I go and stay in a hotel because it’s a 90 minute drive to get to her heart center.  Our poor Dolly is starting to feel the stress of these procedures.  She is very brave, but she hates being without “her kids.”  She lamented their absence multiple times.  By the time we got to the hotel, we were doing okay though.  And, the manager of the hotel, who knows us well, had arts and crafts waiting for our girl.

Dolly's Heart Cath-6We had a pizza party with Dolly’s best friend.  When we got back to the hotel, there was popcorn, a new panda to keep her company and a pedicure.

Dolly's Heart Cath-1The next morning, we were up bright and early to check-in at pre-op.

Dolly's Heart Cath-2My girl was in such a good mood.  She didn’t get to eat breakfast and on the way in, as we rolled through the skywalk at the hospital, Dolly yelled “Look Mom!  The Starbucks is open early! You can wait until I go to sleep and then have a Latte!”  She was thinking about me as she was getting ready for a procedure of huge importance.  But, when I got to the waiting room, I had a latte.  Because Dolly really did want me to.  That’s my girl.

Dolly's Heart Cath-3I had a latte and I prayed.  If her lung pressures were bad, or a valve was failing, or one of the other million possibilities for something going wrong with her heart, what would we do?  What would I do?

I chose to hope.  I chose to hope for the kids who wait, broken without a mama or daddy to help fix them.  I chose hope for the little boy who just arrived home this week, and much like Dolly, was declared inoperable.  I chose to hope for our girl, because whatever happened, we would just keep putting one foot in front of the other.  I drank my coffee, cried into my eggs, and I waited for whatever was to come.

Turns out, hope sometimes turns into a miracle.  Lung pressures are holding steady, within operable range.  Our girl is anemic, which would explain some of the fatigue and lower than normal sats, but other than that, her heart looks great for being the only heart of its kind that clinic has seen.  They’ve seen hearts with one ventricle before, but not one small ventricle that pumps as hard as a regular ventricle, all while doing it backwards.  Yes, our girls unique heart has an aorta and a pulmonary artery that are completely backwards.

As the doctor told me all this, I thanked God for her little broken heart, in a tiny body, that can barely contain its giant spirit.

Pretty soon, she was in Recovery.  And after that, we were ready to go home.

Dolly's Heart Cath-4Straight to her kids.

Dolly's Heart Cath-5In honor of Dolly, and the hope that I want all of you to choose, tomorrow I will begin posting the stories of three boys who need a family.  Three boys who all have broken hearts like Dolly’s.  Some of them have had their miracle, some of them need one.  I am inviting you to choose hope for them.

–FullPlateMom, who is choosing a lot of hope today.


2 thoughts on “Choose HOPE.”

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