This Day.

That’s the only thing I could think of to title this post, because I will always think of it as this day.  On this day two years ago, with a huge lump in my throat all day, I packed all my new baby girl’s things into a tiny pink suitcase, and mine into a less tiny one, loaded a wagon into the car, and wondered what else I might need for our hospital stay.  I was getting ready to watch all my other kids say goodbye to our sweet girl, to watch them all fade away in my rear view mirror.

I wondered if I would bring our girl back alive.

Then, there was the after.  We rolled her into surgery and she came out like a champ.  We had a couple of setbacks, but overall, she busted it right out of there.  I have to remind myself of this.  As much as I celebrate this day, it also brings the lump in my throat back.  I start to doubt.  I start to wonder if God puts a cap on the number of miracles He hands to one woman.  If that’s so, have I reached mine?  Because, there was that time I got my kids out of Ghana.  There was that time that Ghana gave me a daughter so broken that I wondered if she would ever live a normal life and she has.  There was that one time I had a daughter declared terminal and she thrived.  Maybe God is done listening to me ask for things when I am so wholly inadequate?

That’s ridiculous, I know it, but I wonder.

On this day, which is also the eve of her birthday, I have to remember that miracles are limitless, and all I can do is enjoy what we’ve already been given, every single day.

We went from this, where she was nearly two YEARS old and the size of a 6 MONTH OLD.

To this, your developmentally typical almost 4 year old.

DSC_0090

Living every single day like it’s all our last.

–FullPlateMom, who can’t wait to see what the next two years will bring.

One thought on “This Day.

  1. Love this and love you miss Becky!! You are the sweetest, kindest, full plate woman I’ve ever known and you’re right!! G-d’s little miracle box is limitless and full of love! Keep going my friend!!
    Xoxo

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: